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July has been brutally defeated in gladiatorial combat with August reigning supreme. As we clear away its mutilated corpse to make way for the new one, lets take a look at some of the recent GalNet news so we don't have to dwell on how much we're going to miss them now they are gone.
[ATTACH type="full" alt="GalNetRoundUp04082023.png"]363260[/ATTACH]
DEDICANT QUEST YIELDS RESULTS - 27 July 3309
In shocking news, Independent Pilots efforts to track down the logs of the missing Dedicant megaship revealed that a bunch of weirdos who worship screaming lobsters from space were able to overpower a bunch of heavily armed guards with military training. The True Chapters cultists were able to strike down a bunch of guards and make off with their ship to areas unknown, presumably whilst chanting. At least one of them was reported as sticking their head out of the window and shouting "Woo!" as is tradition. What happened after remains to be seen but the egg on the face of the Alliance is looking a little poached.
(Sure, technically it was the Feds who lost them but it was the Alliances big idea to send them over)
THARGOID WAR UPDATE: JULY 3309 - 28 July 3309
Jade Sanderlyn of Vox Galactica fame has taken to the airways once again to update the masses on how things are going in the intergalactic war against the danger flowers that should not be smelled. Despite things looking very bleak previously, reports now indicate that humanity is starting to push back against the Thargoids, reclaiming various systems and bring the pain to the alien enemy. In less than stellar news though, reports are growing that the Thargoids seem to be altering their behaviour, taking more interest in escape pods rather than in shooting down ships. Keep your eyes superglued to the screens and heavily moisturised to see how this sinister behaviour unfolds.
THE FATE OF THE DEDICANT - 3 August 3309
SuprisedAislingDuvalFace.PNG The Dedicant has been found, floating adrift in space and with all it's inhabitants missing. Seems the futuristic Mary Celeste cosplay may have run afoul of Thargoids as there's several tell tale signs of their insectoid presence all over the place. No one could possibly have predicted that the xenophopbic space bugs that have been systematically wiping out humanity could possibly have reacted hostile to the True Chapters. Evidence indicates that several escape pods were launched but there's no sign of them ever making their intended destinations. Even more disturbing are reports that a new Thargoid vessel has been spotted nearby being all menacing in a spooky Thargoid way.
CULTISTS BLAMED FOR DEDICANT TRAGEDY - 4 August 3309
Wasting no time in using current events to point fingers at people he doesn't like, current Federation President Zachary Hudson has blamed the Far God cult for what happened aboard the Dedicant. You know, because it was really kinda their fault this time. Unfortunately, on this occasion hijacking a ship and heading towards the enemy is not a great look during wartime and as such Hudson has started to bring down the hammer on the cultists. He's announced plans for automatic life sentences for anyone affiliated with the Far God Cult, an extreme move that has left the presidential hopefuls reeling on what stance they should take. Jerome "Notice me Zachary senpai" Archer has stated he will continue the harsh clamp down on the cult, Felicia Winters has suggested holding yet another inquiry because you just can't have enough of those and Zachary Rackham has chimed in to suggest that not letting him and his mates be even richer was the real alien invasion all along.
That's it for this week. Join us next time if the fabric of reality hasn't been torn asunder and all of us replaced with our mirror universe counterparts and their fantastic evil hairstyles.
July has been brutally defeated in gladiatorial combat with August reigning supreme. As we clear away its mutilated corpse to make way for the new one, lets take a look at some of the recent GalNet news so we don't have to dwell on how much we're going to miss them now they are gone.
[ATTACH type="full" alt="GalNetRoundUp04082023.png"]363260[/ATTACH]
DEDICANT QUEST YIELDS RESULTS - 27 July 3309
In shocking news, Independent Pilots efforts to track down the logs of the missing Dedicant megaship revealed that a bunch of weirdos who worship screaming lobsters from space were able to overpower a bunch of heavily armed guards with military training. The True Chapters cultists were able to strike down a bunch of guards and make off with their ship to areas unknown, presumably whilst chanting. At least one of them was reported as sticking their head out of the window and shouting "Woo!" as is tradition. What happened after remains to be seen but the egg on the face of the Alliance is looking a little poached.
(Sure, technically it was the Feds who lost them but it was the Alliances big idea to send them over)
THARGOID WAR UPDATE: JULY 3309 - 28 July 3309
Jade Sanderlyn of Vox Galactica fame has taken to the airways once again to update the masses on how things are going in the intergalactic war against the danger flowers that should not be smelled. Despite things looking very bleak previously, reports now indicate that humanity is starting to push back against the Thargoids, reclaiming various systems and bring the pain to the alien enemy. In less than stellar news though, reports are growing that the Thargoids seem to be altering their behaviour, taking more interest in escape pods rather than in shooting down ships. Keep your eyes superglued to the screens and heavily moisturised to see how this sinister behaviour unfolds.
THE FATE OF THE DEDICANT - 3 August 3309
SuprisedAislingDuvalFace.PNG The Dedicant has been found, floating adrift in space and with all it's inhabitants missing. Seems the futuristic Mary Celeste cosplay may have run afoul of Thargoids as there's several tell tale signs of their insectoid presence all over the place. No one could possibly have predicted that the xenophopbic space bugs that have been systematically wiping out humanity could possibly have reacted hostile to the True Chapters. Evidence indicates that several escape pods were launched but there's no sign of them ever making their intended destinations. Even more disturbing are reports that a new Thargoid vessel has been spotted nearby being all menacing in a spooky Thargoid way.
CULTISTS BLAMED FOR DEDICANT TRAGEDY - 4 August 3309
Wasting no time in using current events to point fingers at people he doesn't like, current Federation President Zachary Hudson has blamed the Far God cult for what happened aboard the Dedicant. You know, because it was really kinda their fault this time. Unfortunately, on this occasion hijacking a ship and heading towards the enemy is not a great look during wartime and as such Hudson has started to bring down the hammer on the cultists. He's announced plans for automatic life sentences for anyone affiliated with the Far God Cult, an extreme move that has left the presidential hopefuls reeling on what stance they should take. Jerome "Notice me Zachary senpai" Archer has stated he will continue the harsh clamp down on the cult, Felicia Winters has suggested holding yet another inquiry because you just can't have enough of those and Zachary Rackham has chimed in to suggest that not letting him and his mates be even richer was the real alien invasion all along.
That's it for this week. Join us next time if the fabric of reality hasn't been torn asunder and all of us replaced with our mirror universe counterparts and their fantastic evil hairstyles.