Original Post — Direct link

'Twas the night before Jax buffs and all who played Top,

Their hearts filled with dread and begged Riot to stop

The tickets and tweets were furious and bitter,

As they spammed F5 on Mark Yetter's Twitter.

 

No luck, however, as patch notes decreed:

"Counterstrike cooldown: 16 to 14."

All throughout midnight, top laners would weep;

All but Fiora mains, who were soundly asleep.

 

"You're just overreacting," said LS with a laugh,

But their fear remained of the grandmaster's staff.

TFBlade squeaked with glee, knowing what this meant:

His 17th unranked to challenger series--this time, 90%.

 

Harambe would soon be on suicide watch,

As he cried for Wukong buffs, patch after patch.

And Adrian's viewers hope for a Riven game, perhaps,

But for now, he's known as Adrian "Adrian jaxbuffs" Jax.

 

So what path, dear reader, will you choose on the morrow?

For one, you can ban him, to avoid risking the sorrow.

You can play him yourself, or just take a break.

Merry Jax buffs to all! Now revert them, for f*ck's sake.

External link →
almost 4 years ago - /u/endercasts - Direct link

A sh*tpost worthy of an LEC callout

almost 4 years ago - /u/Auberaun - Direct link

Monitoring Mark's twitter is part of my workflow

almost 4 years ago - /u/BarackProbama - Direct link

Absolutely no one at Riot read this. Not one person. And they didn't cackle like an idiot at every verse.