[2020] Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL, like my new rank is a concealed carry and other people can see it bulging around my waist and are scared of me now

Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much.

Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy.

At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!"

And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero."

I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler."

He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.

The police and I had a long discussion about what happened; to my understanding, I previously did not have an accolade or accessory to mark my razor-sharp intelligence and reaction times. The officers claimed nothing like me has ever rolled into their jurisdiction and politely asked me to register my gold rank as a firearm--because my strategic mind is as dangerous, maybe more dangerous, than most ballistic weapons. Thought waves travel faster than the speed of light.

It's really awkward to go from your average League player on track to his pro career to a dangerous individual that others both run from and hide behind in times of strife. Guess I'll need to get used to it... once I hit platinum, I'll have to start leaving my computer in a gun safe at night.