TELL ME IF I AM AN IDIOT please :]

The "wait a little longer" was for a few hours when the updated released.

Read the actual news.
https://7daystodie.com/winter-patch/

Stealing this from the Official Discord since we have to post it like 20 times a day there because apparently people cannot read.

How to Crossplay Hosting:
Start a new or open an existing save and make sure that in the General tab, Server Enabled is set to "Online", and Crossplay Enabled set to "On" before starting your world.

If you are hosting from PC, you need to meet the following requirements so your world is visible for other platforms:

• Version 1.2 b27 or later
  
• EAC: Enabled
  
• Max map size: 8k
  
• Max player count: 8
  
• Mods: None

Joining:

1. Select the Join a Game option in the main menu
   
2. Under Server Name, type the Steam/MS/PlayStation ID of the host you want to join (or leave it blank), make sure to select the correct Region too and start your search.
   
3. In the next window, make sure you are in the Peer to Peer (P2P) tab, represented by the 유웃 icon. Search for the name of the host you want to connect to, click on it and then click on Connect.